It’s always difficult to know when a relationship is over but sometimes the answer is right in front of you, you just need it to be pointed out. We’ve got expert advice on how to know when it’s time to call it a day with your man.
You’re failing to communicate…
“Communication is so essential to a relationship, that the lack thereof can be a sign that the
Failing to communicate will leave a big void in your relationship and cause minor problems to spiral into unnecessary issues. Try going for an afternoon walk or book a table at your local restaurant, with no distractions the conversation should flow more easily. If it proves to be difficult and it becomes apparent that you simply just don’t care anymore then you know what to do.
Having a healthy sex life and one that suits both your libidos and sexual desires is important for every relationship, but if your bedroom time has gone from exciting and experimental to dull and repetitive then it’s time to decide why.
You’re bored
At the beginning of your relationship, his romantic gestures came thick and fast and every little indication of his affection would ignite the flame of excitement in you. But now the honeymoon period is over, your time together is more about staying in front of the telly rather then romantic meals and walks in the park.
While this isn’t necessarily time to call it quits immediately, do let him know you need some more excitement again, even if it’s a case of simply making a date at your local restaurant. If he fails to make the effort then it’s time to question just how much this relationship means to each of you. If he isn’t interested then why should you be?
You pick fights
Picking fights with your loved one is a sign of irritation and unfortunately, the beginning of the end. Relationship expert, Rachel DeAlto says, “Often women tend to start picking fights when they feel a relationship is at its end. They are trying to get the guy to do the dirty work and break it off.”
So if the small things that never used to bother you are now more infuriating then cute, it’s time to move on to someone where you can spend your time snogging rather then arguing.
You avoid future plans
Does the thought of spending more time with your man then necessary fill you with dread? Then you need to have a serious relationship overhaul! Being in love should never be a chore or require too much effort. In fact, you should be counting downthe days to booking another romantic trip or having that quiet evening you’ve planned together.
So what if you’re not? Well, you can’t MAKE yourself want to spend time with someone, try doing something you’re both interested in to give your relationship one last shot. If you still want to avoid him afterwards, then it’s time to avoid the relationshipaltogether.
You don’t get affectionate
Can you remember the last time you missed your man? Do you often tell him you love him? Love snuggling up for a cuddle? If these feelings and expressions have become a thing of the past, then your relationship needs a emotional overhaul. If you don’t want to embrace your man or you wouldn’t miss him if he left then its time to move on.
You start daydreaming…
We’re not talking about that dream where you meet up with Ryan Gosling and you fall hopelessly in love. We’re talking about full-on daydreams of your life as a single woman or how you’re going to attract the new guy at work. “If you start daydreaming about other men, imagining your life as a single woman, and fantasising about the next guy you want to date, your relationship is basically over. You have already started to emotionally detach,” says Rachel DeAlto.
So if you find yourself drifting into sweet dreams about everyone OTHER then your man, you need to question just why that is. Have you fallen out of love? Does he fail to float your boat? Or is he just boring you? Either way, it’s HIM you should be dreaming about, so you need to rethink if you have a wandering mind.
You fight constantly
A spat of words in a relationship is a great way to vent and can actually be healthy, after all, it shows you both still care. If you get to a point however, when you can no longer resolve the issues and just fight ALL the time, you need to think about how you want to continue in the relationship. If you find you both still have the desire to sort things out, you could be in with a chance of reviving your relationship. If there’s no want, then unfortunately there’s no relationship.
You’ve lost interest
At the beginning of a relationship, you and your man are inseparable. You embark on endless text convos about what you’re up to, late night phone calls to see how his day went and go on spontaneous dates so you can spend even more time together. Once chatting about these general day-to-day topics no longer interests either of you, it’s time to decide whether you’ve outgrown one another.
“In love, you know your relationship is over when you become completely indifferent to them,” says relationship expert Rachel DeAlto. “If you don’t care what he does, where he goes or whether you even see him, it is time to move on.”
Rachel also adds, “The opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference,” so if you don’t feel anything strong, then the passion has definitely left the building!
He’s cheated
It is not impossible to get over the fact your man cheated, many couples do it and can become stronger as a result. For some of us however, it’s a tough hurdle to get over.
“Cheating in a relationship is always damaging. There are many factors that come into play when deciding if it’s time to call it quits, but it all comes down to whether you can rebuild the trust,” says Rachel DeAlto. “If you cannot forgive and trust them again, it’s better to walk away.”
Try a romantic break to see if you can rekindle some romance and remember why you fell in love. If you still can’t get over a past infidelity, then you need to consider that his breach of trust may just not be something you will ever get over.
Adapted from Cosmopolitan
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