(NEWSER) – A man was jailed for three years yesterday over a plan to kill Prince Harry ... but his murder plot was, as the judge put it, "vague and unlikely to succeed" at best, comical at worst. Ashraf Islam, a con man from Northern Ireland formerly known as Mark David Townley who converted to Islam in jail, first did "research" on Prince Harry, meaning he did a few Internet searches on the young royal's whereabouts, schedule, and security team. He then hatched his plan: Pose as a tourist, disarm a guard rather than bringing his own gun, and then, well, we'll let him take it from here:
What went wrong? Well, instead of attempting to carry out his nefarious plan, Islam walked into a West London police station on May 23 and told police all about it, the Daily Beast reports. Irish news anchor Philip Boucher-Hayes has been following Townley/Islam for a while, and says, "If I had to speculate wildly as to why Townley has handed himself in to police it would be either because he has once again fallen on hard times and wants three square (meals) and a bed at the taxpayer’s expense. Or perhaps he’s trying to put himself beyond the reach of his creditors." As to a motive, Islam says Prince Harry has "blood on his hands" because of his connection to the British Army. In other royal news, Prince William recently went boar hunting, leading outspoken animal rights activist Morrissey to call the prince a "thickwit" and declare that he hopes William's and Harry's "hunting guns backfire in their faces," the Daily Beast reports.